Getting a Get Can Come Very Dear

In the Orthodox Jewish community, if a woman hopes to remarry within the Orthodox community, she needs more than a divorce from a family court. She needs a religious divorce, known as a “get”.

The challenge is that obtaining a get requires the Husband’s consent. And sometimes they just don’t want to cooperate.

The community can apply social pressure to such an uncooperative Husband. But sometimes that’s not enough either.

In such cases, one may turn to a a rabbi, a Jewish clergyman, to sway the Husband.

Sometimes it is alleged that the rabbi goes overboard in obtaining the Husband’s consent.

In such a case, a New Jersey rabbi and his co-defendants have been convicted in federal court of conspiracy to commit kidnapping … but not of kidnapping, as well as some other charges.

Among the allegations were torture with electric cattle prods and other implements.

The arrests were the result of a sting operation.

The trial lasted eight weeks.

The convicted defendants plan to appeal.

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Tips for Divorce-Proofing Your Marriage

Experts suggest:

  1. Make each reunion warm
  1. Offer support
  1. Really connect, physically and emotionally, every day
  1. Never neglect the physical dimension of your relationship
  1. Remember to acknowledge the things your partner does for you, no matter how small
  1. Communicate about your feelings
  1. Send loving messages every day
  1. Be kind, not mean, no matter what
  1. Don’t cling to angry feelings

Read more in this Brides magazine article: 9 Daily Habits to Divorce-Proof Your Marriage.

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Child Support Delinquency: Crack Down, Ease Up, Forget About It Completely?

In some states, there are some folks who spend some time in jail for nonpayment of child support.

If they genuinely are unable to pay, this may seem harsh. Actually, even if they are able to pay but just choose not to, this may still seem harsh.

There are some more who temporarily lose their driver’s license for nonpayment of child support. Ditto. Ditto.

One New York father, highlighted in a recent newspaper article, was shot fleeing a police officer … who stopped his car over a broken taillight.

The deceased man’s brother attributes this improbable incident to the man’s child support delinquency. Specifically, he postulates that his brother ran because he feared being jailed and losing his job due to the broken light.

The surviving brother claims that his deceased brother was eventually discharged from every single job that he ever had because he was incarcerated during his employment in each position over his child support arrears.

While conceding that incarceration does encourage payment by parents who have the ability to pay, opponents of incarceration for child support delinquency maintain that it has a punitive impact on poor people, confining them in a vicious circle of unemployment, arrears and jail.

They further voice the opinion that child support orders routinely are unfairly large to begin with, so the paying parent is set up for failure, property seizures, suspension of licenses to drive and engage in a business or profession. ( Note: child support calculations vary widely from state to state, as does use of incarceration as a means of enforcement of payment. )

One thing that is the same in every state: if a custodial parent applies for public assistance, the government will eventually seek to collect child support as reimbursement for assistance paid out to that parent.

Read more in this New York Times article: Skip Child Support. Go to Jail. Lose Job. Repeat.

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Child Custody? Pot Use? Know Your State – Or Else …

Elementary school runs anti-drug educational program.

During program, eleven year old Boy pipes up to extol the virtues of medical marijuana use in general … and by his Mother in particular.

Problem is, Boy and Mother live in Kansas … where pot is illegal, even for medical use.

As a result, Boy is removed from Mother’s custody and placed into child protective custody.

The law is the law, of course.

Yet, adding insult to injury, a scant hour away from Mother’s home, lies Colorado, where not only is medical marijuana use perfectly legal, but so also is purely recreational use of cannabis. Presumably, custody of a child is unlikely to be impacted merely by using pot in Colorado.

Further away, here in Florida, as in Kansas, even medical marijuana use is prohibited by law.

Yet, in this corner of Florida, a family court judge is probably not so likely to modify visitation, let alone strip a parent of custody, of their child, due to temperate medical or recreational marijuana use, at least absent demonstrable danger or harm to the child.

As for Mother, her position might have been more impregnable if her cannabis and paraphernalia were somewhat less visible to Boy and better secured when not in use … or, then again, perhaps, if she were not quite so evangelistic about use of marijuana for medical purposes…

The big takeaway, which bears emphasis, is that child custody law in particular and family law in general is a matter of state law. It is not federal or uniform. What happened in your fifth cousin’s divorce in this or that other state has nothing at all to do with what will happen in your state.

Read more in this Yahoo News article: Mom Loses Custody After Son Talks About Her Medical Pot Use at School

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Husband and Wife Against the World, or the State of Maryland Anyway

Maryland Husband and Wife have two Children, aged 10 and 6.

Children walk to a park approximately 1 mile from their home. Children walk home from park. Or begin to.

Neighbor observes Children coming and going alone and reports the unsupervised activity to Maryland’s Child Protective Services. Even though Children are perfectly fine.

Next thing Husband and Wife know, Child Protective Services has deemed them to be “responsible for unsubstantiated child neglect”. And they are threatened with losing their Children to foster care.

It turns out that local laws of the City of Silver Spring define child neglect as leaving any child younger that eighteen without supervision of an adult or a child who is at least 13 years old. Yes, really.

The first time, Husband and Wife receive warnings and threats. The next time, police actually pick Children up and deliver them to a Child Protective Services facility.

All told, the Children are detained for 5 or 6 hours. And traumatized by it all.

Husband and Wife very purposefully favor allowing Children freedom as a path toward developing independence and self-sufficiency.

These incidents raise multiple sociopolitical issues regarding parental rights and governmental boundaries.

Read more in

  1. this ABC news article: ‘Free Range’ Parents Found Responsible for Child Neglect After Allowing Kids to Walk Home Alone
  2. this Yahoo News article by way of Good Morning America: Maryland ‘Free Range’ Kids Taken Into Custody Again and
  3. this Yahoo Finance article: There’s a parenting trend that’s taken over the US, and it’s changing children everywhere .
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Mother to be Charged for Abandoning Disabled and Dependent Legally Adult Child

Twenty-one year old Son and his 16 year old Brother live with Mother. Son is quadriplegic, nonverbal, and wheelchair-bound by cerebral palsy.

Son is dependent on Mother’s care. Son attends a high school program for people with special needs.

Mother has a Boyfriend in Maryland. Mother wanted to visit Boyfriend.

So Mother took Son to the woods near their home, removed him from his wheelchair and placed him on the ground … and left him there with nothing but a bible and his wheelchair in the vicinity.

After several days, a neighbor noticed the wheelchair and called the police, which led to Son’s rescue. Son was suffering from dehydration and malnutrition.

An arrest warrant issued and, upon her return from Maryland, Mother is expected to be charged with aggravated assault, kidnapping, neglect of a care-dependent person.

Son is still in the hospital and Brother is in the care of extended family.

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Marine Allegedly Kills Wife Over Custody of Their Son

Alabama Husband and Wife have a six year old Son together.

Chances are, they appeared to be a happy, ordinary couple.

Until one day Wife dashed into a doctor’s office very close to her home and urged the staff there to call 911 for her.

Husband arrived hot on Wife’s heels and allegedly shot her in the head, killing her.

Husband then fled back to his nearby home, awaiting police.

The police took Husband into custody without any gunfire, but Husband was shot in the head as well – apparently by his own hand.

Husband has been charged with murder.

Son was not present during the domestic violence or for Husband’s arrest.

This incident took place in a very small town with a population less than 3,000.

Husband previously served in the US Marines.

Husband and Wife were reportedly engaged in a custody battle over Son.

Read more in

  1. this Alabama.com news article: Former Marine charged with murder in shooting death of wife at Jemison doctor’s office
  2. this UK Daily Mail article: Pictured: Mother, 24, shot dead by her Marine veteran husband in Alabama doctor’s office after he wrote chilling Facebook post saying he would ‘die today’ and
  3. this Yahoo News article: Husband fatally shot wife at doctor’s office, police say .
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Mother Charged With Misdemeanor Child Endangerment for Dropping Toddler Into Cheetah Habitat at Zoo

Ohio Husband and Wife have a 2 year old boy, Toddler. Husband and Wife take Toddler to the Cleveland MetroPark Zoo.

Wife allegedly extends her arms to hold Toddler out beyond a safety railing and directly above the cheetah habitat … and drops Toddler into it.

Wife and Husband both promptly leap into the exhibit to retrieve Toddler, and do successfully rescue him without attracting the interest of any cheetahs. Toddler did break a leg during the incident anyway though, according to reports.

Wife has been charged with misdemeanor child endangerment.

As if that weren’t disturbing enough in and of itself, it turns out that Wife is the assistant director of a Columbus branch of private daycare and preschool establishments operating nationwide.

Wife is reportedly barred from her workplace pending the outcome of both internal and police investigations and reviews.

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